The Hardest Part About Being Me

Certain things always seem to happen to other people and never to me. This
is why for a long time I had a hard time coming to turns with what was
happening to me.

Having to work full-time to pay for my tuition last semester, while taking
18 credits, trying to continue the success of thePearl Magazine, being Senior
Class Rep., being involved with clubs on campus and trying to be a good friend
and daughter took a toll on me.

I felt a lot of pressure to stay on top and to live up to everyone else's expectations of me.

For months, I had no energy and found it hard to concentrate. Even the
smallest task was overwhelming. I would often forget to eat and when I did
remember, I would binge - eating any and everything I could get my hands around
(once an entire Costco-size box of fruit roll-ups). I gained 15 pounds in 3
months.

I felt irritable and anxious. I always felt tired and uninterested in doing
anything to get my mind off the way I was feeling.

I wasn't doing as well as I would have liked in my classes and I didn't
care. I was just happy to make it through each day. No one around seemed to
know what was going on with me - as I was always able to maintain a strong
exterior.

I wasn't able to keep up with thePearl the way I wanted to. I felt like a
failure. Each time someone would ask me what was going on with the Mag, it
would spiral me deeper and deeper into the black cloud.

It's been four months and things are getting better for me. I am taking one
day at a time and keeping God first.

On this day, I've decided to share my plight. Hoping that my confession will
touch someone, anyone. It's been important for me to remember that no matter
how bad it gets, it will get better.

I know I'm not the only person going through this. Take charge of your life and
how you are feeling. If you need help, speak to someone.

Try calling a hotline: 1-800-448-3000

THERE IS NEVER A TESITMONY WITHOUT A TEST!